Galleria Task List

One legend of Tundaloo is that of Gabby Gable. Gabby was ga-ga over a gorgeous gal, Gladys. Gladys grew golden germaniums in her galley and gladly gave Gabby good galley gifts. Gabby was game, but grew guilty and gloomy; he had no gold or glamorous gifts to give to Gladys. But then Gabby got great goals. "Good God," he gasped gleefully. "I'll give Gladys a glance at my glorious gusto in the Galleria."

Guys and gals gathered to gawk at the goof going about his goals. But Gladys thought he was a gutsy guy and Gabby got the girl. (Groan. Makes me want to gag.)

Here are the tasks Gabby tried. We do not recommend doing all of them. Many are (quite) fake. Other clues will tell you which ones to try.

AUXS

Form your team into a conga line on the second floor and walk from the Westin Galleria Hotel entrance to Lord & Taylor, humming "Limbo Rock," bobbing down every eight steps.

BAXR

Walk into Sheer Insanity, and say at least seven words beginning with "Z."

BEFR

Go into Greetings, Etc. and ask for "a hello, two salutations, and five how's-it-hangings."

BENK

Go into Remington Shavers 'N Knives, and ask for their most deadly weapon, inquiring whether it cuts human flesh.

BEXR

Go to a cashier at McDonald's, with all the team members announcing in unison, "Two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame-seed bun."

BIRT

Go to British Passage, and ask for a ticket to London.

BREX

Go to a cashier at Shoe Gallery Jr., offer your wrist and say, "The answer is in the scent. Whiff my wrist. Whiff my wrist."

CERX

Go to Marble Slab and ask for the "Orgasmic Delight, hold the cherries."

CRUT

Ask cashier at Best of India to compare elbows with you.

DEHG

Ask the employees at Hanson Galleries where the closest Space Invaders game is.

FORL

Go to the main desk at Sam Houston Book Store and enunciate, "The fish is in the sea. And so is my nose. Help me - I can't breathe. Cleanly."

GNEW

Go into Alexia, click your heels, and shout, "There's no place like home. There's no place like home."

GRIB

Enter The Fun Shop with your hand out of sight, and ask them if they've sold your severed fingers yet, because you want them back.

GRON

Go into A2Z, The Best of Everything and introduce yourself to the cashier in Pig Latin.

GRUN

Go to the Information Booth and ask who invented the sewing machine.

GUIP

Go into The Limited, and ask for infinity.

KEXG

Go to the elevator lobby on the third floor at the Galleria Financial Center and sing as a team, "You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin'."

MEBS

Go into Telephone World and tell the cashier, "The bird has landed. The plane took off. I need the gerbil. I NEED the gerbil."

NEWG

Go into Victoria's Secret and ask for Superman Underoos.

NORG

Remove a shoe, and run into Houston Shoe Hospital, exclaiming, "Cardiac arrest!"

PLOK

Go into Margo's, and ask the cashier where the Margo's in the Galleria is.

POUG

Go into Purplemania, Etc. and ask the cashier, "Why?!? Just WHY?!?"

PREL

Go to a cashier at Deck the Walls and say, "I'd like some boughs of holly," and have the team say in unison, "fa-la-la-la-la, la-la, la-la."

PROT

Go to The Tie Rack, and ask how to do a triple-reverse Windsor, with all the trimmings.

PUHG

Go to the Lord & Taylor perfume counter, and ask for "Confessions of a Mule."

QRET

Assemble your team in a line and moonwalk together around the ice-skating rink.

QUIL

Go into Fantasies by Morgan Taylor, and ask for "an outfit that says, 'Squeeze me like a ripe melon.'"

REWG

Jump on the staircase nearest Allegro and Candy Basket, exclaiming, "It doesn't move! It's broken!"

REXB

Ask the vendor at Christy's Fresh Cinnamon Rolls to stop following you to the spaceship and spreading rumors that you're crazy.

SURK

Go to the desk at Macy's electronics department and ask if there's an After-School Special showing today, and if they mind if you watch it there.

TGIP

Count the number of steps on the escalator next to Oaktree and tell the answer to the cashier a Velleriano Italy. (That escalator has XX steps on it!)

THEW

Go into Circus World, and ask the cashier for a condom for a Ken doll.

TIRB

Ask at House of Almonds how many types of nuts are sold, emphasizing the word 'nuts,' winking.

TORP

Go to the Information Booth and ask if Olivia Newton-John is still seeing John Travolta.

TRIB

Go to Petland and ask, "How much is that doggie in the window?"

TUGH

Walk into Webster and tell the cashier, "Emmanuelle Lewis sent me. The clothes are too big. They just won't do. Do you have a pencil sharpener?"

TUIG

Go to the middle of the Cafe Court, and have the entire team sing the chorus of "I Write the Songs," by Barry Manilow four times, going to a higher key each time.

TWOO

Have three members of the team lie down on the floor in front of the entrance to Cinema II in the shape of a letter "H."

VERT

Go to Orient Express and ask, "How many murders have there been so far?"

WENX

Go to Louise Blum and ask, "May I please see the brides you have on sale?"

WHUT

Go to Neuhaus Chocolates, buy a 100g Toblerone bar, eat it, and promptly throw away the box.

WOOT

Go into Everything's a $1, take any of their products up to the counter, and ask how much it is.

XEBR

Go into Bag 'n Baggage, and ask an employee if they sell anything large enough to hold a "stuffed animal" that's about the size of a human body.

XERB

Go into Glamour Shots, and ask them if they can make you look "unrelentingly ugly."

XKAO

Go to the cashier at Gap Kids and ask to try on a pair of socks, using only hand and body gestures.

XWEN

Go into Casual Corner, approach the two mannequins in the front (not the ones in the windows), look at the one with the evil eye, and ask it out on a date using at least two come-ons.

YERP

Go into Units and ask for a hectogram.

YOPE

Go to the planter box at the northeast corner of Chick-Fil-A and sing in unison, "Oh, I wish I were an Oscar Meyer weiner."

YTAR

Go into Sam Goody and ask for Barry Manilow's "bold new album."

ZING

Go to the automatic teller machine next to T & Tomato, hug it, and cry, "I just can't live without you. Would you please give us one more chance?"